she says i dont like anything she does. told you i was the big bad wolf. made into the monster. told you shes trying to hate me. i dont understand this. when theres something that makes me feel bad, i tell her. she wanted honesty? i gave honesty. but now thats why im a bad guy. cuz im fucking honest. i swear, anything she asks for and i give, its wrong. like being honest. saying things straight up. i doubt that really helps any. isnt this great? she hangs up when theres problems. i shut up. we are both amazing at solving problems. mhmph. please dont fuck with the temporarily-psycotic stoner. its not cool. wow. i am my mom. doesnt this fucking suck. i hate these gay problems. and that i make her feel like shit. it sucks cuz whenever shes in a bad mood i get to be in a bad mood and then i cant cheer her up. i dont see how im any good for her it seems like all i do is piss her off and make her feel bad. i dont want to break up. no way, jose. but i wish i wasnt such a fucking devil in her eyes. i feel like such a devil. i swear i used to be so nice. i always blame those events for why im not so nice anymore and why i do the fucked up things i do. why i dont care so much of the time. and i dont know if that shit caused this change in my personality. or if it was growing up. but if thats what caused it, i fucking hate it. because i swear i was such a better person before. but maybe this is just the way it was supposed to go. that i would get here even if this didnt happen. maybe naive is just nice. and i learned that there are bad people are there and i learned a lot lot more. i learned more about the devils of society. and it ruined my naive dreams and fantasies of flying into the air and being all the bright colors in the world. maybe thats what growing up is. i really do hate growing up if thats so. wow. being naive really is lucky.