Landen gave me this cd with this song on it. who'da thunk! a cd with a song on it. .. anyhoo. He said It was exactly our song. sO I popped it in while I was doing my homework and it hit me so hard I had to leave the room so Bree and Taina wouldnt see me cry. I went to my 'special place' and breathed in and out. "nono... I was over it..." I screamed and stoped the cd. breathed and left my discman in the place. I forgot on purpose how it was... that night he called and I lied and told him I didnt listen to it ( i didnt hear all of it!) he said I should because it would make me sooo happy! So I tried it again while I was getting in the shower. haha... Later that night I woke up and found myself on the floor against my wall. :) This morning I listened to it again while I got ready...and It did make me happy. after I realized that what we had was/is good. and I shouldnt just forget it, but...remeber all of it. :) yay! Today was good. Brett showed me his "death book" haha, a bunch of pictures with all the animals he murdered. I mean...hunted. It was sad. Then I saw the picture of him holding his first pheasent he killed and I laughed...but no one laughed with me. It made me laugh harder. hahaha. peasent's foot... Taina came home with me and helped me around the house and then we went to emi's and sat around. haha. later came home, and my family was fighting again so We went to bree's house and I slept while they watched "Shark Tales" I love it there, it's so quiet...mmm peace. I came home and cuddled with my mom. she sounded hurt because I rejected her then came back and snuggled... I'm sorry mom! haha, tomorrow is the big party. Lauren is going to another, a hotel party. to get drunk and whatnot...ohboy. I hope I'll survive my party. I don't like to be around a lot of people, especially girls. everyone hates everyone else but we're forcing them to be together because of taina. heee. Today Megan Olson took me to mcdonalds. she got me a MIGHTY kidsmeal because I delivered something for her. yay. I got a toy! It's been a nice day so far. ahhh... Bree rubbed my head and played with my hair. I love it when she does that! and Murri didnt twirl my hair today...sad. But I did see matt. Didnt say hi. and Micah played my song that me and sara song at the Concert. I can't help falling in love with you! waaa. so It started me off on this whole thing all over again. *sigh* yeeha! Yay! Sorry If I sound so emo-depressed in this enty. I'm reallly not. not at all. haha, just tired.