I was thinking about it. looking back on everything. And I've trained myself not to be certain. told my heart never to trust. but, journal, It just makes sense. The comments. the looks. the randomness of it all. I hope it's not too late. thats all. I'll fess up someday. one night. I don't know. I just don't understand. and I think that's why I like it so much. Something I can't talk my way out of. It's sweet. we watched 13 going on 30. when Matty says "I've always loved you." I'm hopeless, I know it. nothing practical. not really ethical. kind of uncertain. hmm, I love it. I fall for the cheesey on the movies. Satisfying something. When in real life I always thought it was stupid. hm. ahem, anyways. It's been good. woke up around 9 today. I was so proud of myself. I layed in my bed and sang "total eclipse of the heart" hee. I did my thing and got dressed. later I went to lessons. Clark kept telling me about how these things will help me with bass. haha, so, am I in? yikes. He gave me a lot more to work on. yay. later he called me and told me I gave him too much money. He said he didn't mind, but he didnt' want me to be lacking in anyway. I told him it was just what I had left from my pay check. haha, then he whined and said "I took the rest of your paycheck?!" hmm... the poor soul, he took pity on my lack of a job. then I came home...and layed aroud. yay.