Has the thud of a pulse stuck inside my head and for me, to understand all meaning i need to smuther, myself with you and then it will all fade... fade far away. this is just a bad luck streak. its my life and yet i allow another to go loose.. i kinda wish i was the one so lonely, they all say im sure i get new people in my life all the time. yes we all do. do i trust not really. and my attutide of the living become oh so adaptable. and i wonder will i ever find a real friend.. nevermind about, the one thing we all think about... a lover and then a friends.... so i still here and wonder what will if feel like will i know and how..will i know. and have a had just let it go cus it suppose to be perfect? I know he loves me..and its soo easy for me to say no... but he can barely even say the words to me.. is this fair. no! i love him but he is just not all there.