i guess today was alright. me and kelsey had great fun at the mall. and when i tried to call courtney from the cell phone i ended up calling mcdonalds. great times. i feel like God is calling me to go caroling for charity money. i hope some people will do it with me so that i am not alone. hehe. i feel God with me sometimes in choir when we sing the song "What Child is This", i feel like i want to cry my eyes out. ive managed to keep control each time so far, but its just an overwhelming feeling of... every single sin ive ever made catching up to me and i can feel it weighing me down and how i am not good enough for God's presence or to go to heaven. its like a feeling like i shouldnt even ask God for anything because i am so unworthy, and it makes me want to cry so hard... but i also get ideas when i feel that, like caroling for charity, and giving up my Christmas for toys for tots. i am getting a few things for Christmas...but prolly about 100 or 200 dollars of my Christmas (about half or 2/3)is gonna go to charity...my gma is giving like 20 dollars towards the cure for cancer for me. its sad what the world is coming to...sometimes people make fun of me for being too nice, and say they will "fix" me. oh well. i think im gonna see a movie later tonight. who knows what. ly -me