every time i'm tired or i have some other thing that partially impairs my ability to think logically, i feel this extreme pull towards another period of time that happened to be infinitely more genuine and more 'me' than this time period, and sometimes before i can stop myself the words i miss my old life form in my head. i couldnt sleep last night, was up till four in the morning listening to incense and peppermints by strawberry alarm clock looking up mod and hippie fashions. im drawn to that time period with an intensity that almost hurts, and i cant even begin to understand, much less explain. happy fourth of july. i also realized that i have an extreme fear of the stomach dropping feeling, without any cause from my childhood of it. and when i was little i had nightmares almost every night of being older and falling off a cliff. weird. i feel like im going crazy. im going to start saving for a volkswagon bus. ive wanted one for a long while.