Dear Diary, I was reading through some of my past entries tonight, and I realized that I'm not a very nice person. A few of those entries were pretty... ugly. And I'm very... dramatic. I make a lot of things into a huge deal when they don't have to be. Sigh. My poor friends. Another thing... I read my entry "depression." And I realized that I REALLY need to do something. I feel like I have a duty to help the world see what depression is like, especially for teenagers... and I'm not doing my duty. I'm not doing ANYTHING. I really wish I could write a book about it... I just don't know how to go about doing it, and more importantly, I'm afraid I'll fail. This is SO important to me... It needs to be good. If it's not any good no one will ever read it and then I won't have helped anyone. I feel like this is the one way I'll ever have any impact on the world. But I'm only seventeen. How can I write something so important? I could put it off... but the sooner I write it the fresher my emotions will be. And heck, I'm a teenager! What better time to write about teenage life? I don't know... I just feel so... worthless. I'm not doing anything to improve the world. I'm not even doing anything to improve myself. I'm just... exisitng. Today I hung out with my broken niece, Kylee, for nine hours. Then I drove to SLC to pick my dad up from the airport. And that's what I did today. Love, Lisa Ann --later-- I think what's really bugging me is that I'm not doing anything in my life. Even when school starts, I'm not really there for a purpose. I'm just going for the heck of it. And... I kind of feel like I'll never be able to do anything with my life. I have so many hopes and dreams... but I don't feel like I'm worthy to accomplish any of them. I don't know how to make my life the way it should be... Sigh. I guess I'm just depressed tonight...