i know i know it is sooooo far from how i can be. but today was just... gawd. good. with the exception of the fact that arjay is more pissed off than ever at jordan... but i am trying not to think of her at the moment... because it will totally ruin my good mood. so all day jordan was way nice. specially at pegasette and on IM when i FINALLY got home. cj wasnt there. we got to watch a movie in fourth. stupid giddyup thing in dance. jordan nice. :) i wish i knew how to do those cute little hearts. anyone know? if you do and you read this PLEASE tell me!!!!!! so arjay got grounded for some reason i dunno and she didnt go to pegasette, but jordan and nes and i did, and he was being "chemosabe" and wrapping his gear up shirt around his head. he makes me laugh so much. people thought paul was a terrorist in school. his poems are amazing. and unfortunately, none of his nor mine won our little contest thingy. the stupid gay ones won. but when i finally got home after waiting here at home for like a half hour before i could even get on... i finally got on... and today has been the first time since november that i have talked to jordan more than arjay. and he has been VERY nice. and i am so happy. AND! there is a dance tomorrow. AND (feel good and bad about this) jackie wrote him a note at lunch telling him to be friends w/ arjay again and asking if all four of them (jackie, jordan, paul arjay) could go to the dance together to morrow, and he THREW IT AWAY!!!!!!!!! which means he totally doesnt like jackie and hes being so uberly nice to me.... things are going pretty swell today... it is the first time for a while i have had an honest to god smile on my face for a good reason for longer than an hour. i really am ecstatic. :) ************************************************************** wallakwalla: hello kimusabi Zerosforgotten: CHEMOSABE! wallakwalla: ok! sorry i didnt know how you spelled it. wallakwalla: chemosabe Zerosforgotten: why did our poems have similar words wallakwalla: i dont know. Zerosforgotten: ive never even seen that poem Zerosforgotten: of yours wallakwalla: and i've never seen yours... Zerosforgotten: hmm.great minds think alike? wallakwalla: i gues... its just really... weird Zerosforgotten: freaky coincidence wallakwalla: yeah. there've been a few recently wallakwalla: oh the sun poem won Zerosforgotten: huh? wallakwalla: we picked winners and the "sun" poem and the one that eric and parris wrote won wallakwalla: thought i'd let you know Zerosforgotten: WHY DONT THEY EVER PICK GOOD POEMS.PARRIS AND ERIC DESEVERED IT BUT IM SO SICK OF THEM PICKING GAY ASS POEMS FOR WINNERS wallakwalla: i know wallakwalla: like the mustangs one Zerosforgotten: GAWD Zerosforgotten: SERIOUSLY wallakwalla: gag me with the freakin poem Zerosforgotten: THEY ALWAYS TIP THE VOTE IN THEIR FAVOR,DONT MATTER WHO WE LIKED wallakwalla: it's what THEY like Zerosforgotten: WHAT ABOUT MY OTHER POEM,ANTHOLOGY? wallakwalla: it got good, but it didnt win. Zerosforgotten: DID IT DO BETTER THAN HOPE DID? wallakwalla: christiansen "didnt like the way it ended" with "to build on the broken" i think... wallakwalla: no Zerosforgotten: HMMM.I REALLY THINK THEY SHGOULD STOP PICKING FRUITY GAY POEMS. ID PREFER A POEM THAT MAKES YOU THINK wallakwalla: or actually makes you feel.. Zerosforgotten: INSTEAD OF SOUNDING PRETTY OR WRITTEN FUNNY wallakwalla: i know. sometimes really choppy things can make you think the most and are actually the best Zerosforgotten: TRUE TRUE,BUT THE FUCKING POEM ABOUT SUNLIGHT? GIMME A FUCKING BREAK Zerosforgotten: gawd that makes me mad wallakwalla: i know.. wallakwalla: hte top seven were-sun, the sound,10 colors, road of life, greatest love poem ever, machine, pink sakura(flower yip yip) wallakwalla: it made me mad. Zerosforgotten: omfg Zerosforgotten: only happy ones were chosen Zerosforgotten: im fuckin madder now wallakwalla: i have to tell you things again: SquirrelWraithe: he doesnt understand that after everything has been gone over, its like he purposefully toys with people SquirrelWraithe: and i dont know what to do anymore. i dont know what i wanted when i asked paul out. i dont know what i wanted when i let jordan hold my handSquirrelWraithe: and the more i think about what i might have possibly done to jordan,t he less i want to be with anyone wallakwalla: i know Zerosforgotten: they better put at least one of my poems in there this year,cuz the way its going i doubt they will wallakwalla: SquirrelWraithe: and the more he says that i did it all, the more i become convincedSquirrelWraithe: and even when i tell him how i feel about him he says "whatever" and it hurts even more SquirrelWraithe: because then i think that he thinks im lying to himSquirrelWraithe: i swear to gawd it seems like it was all planned out... and the way that things are weird between me and paul because of jordan makes it that much wosre wallakwalla: they better. they are good wallakwalla: i hate listening to her complain... Zerosforgotten: sorry wallakwalla: its ok.. it just makes me feel bad... and i dont like feeling bad for people usually Zerosforgotten: i know i know wallakwalla: anyway, its supposed to be shades light and dark, and they are afraid of the dark stuff. they made it the theme, they should put up with it Zerosforgotten: i know.they only put in happy shit,it should be "happiness in people" or something. they better put poems from me and you in,were the darkest around,if they dont then they dont respect dark poetry wallakwalla: yeah. i know. wallakwalla: i g2g. ttyl Zerosforgotten: kk wallakwalla: dark is better usually ************************************************************ i got complimented! and theres a dance tomorrow and hes not going with chuck or anyone!well i dunno if he's even going... but a girl CAN dream.... sigh