go the fuck ahead. hate me. hate me because i wanted what you took from me. you took it from me and wouldn't give it back. to me, that is fucking stealing. she threw it at my fucking head. it almost hit me. i wish it had. i wish it had put me out. then i could cry and pretend it was just because that hurt... all day long, whispers and secrets, dirty looks and things that make my skin crawl, screams and overheard shit that i know was about me. you make me want to fucking die. I OFFERED YOU A PLACE TO STAY IF YOUR FATHER BEAT YOU. AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME? I'M THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS ANY RIGHT TO BE ANGRY HERE. you stole it... i didn't say thief. i didn't i didn't I FUCKING DIDN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to tell my mom what was wrong... kolby said she put acid in my eyeshadow... i cried.... she looked at me and said that she needed help. counseling. SHES NOT THE ONLY FUCKING ONE she gave me a hug and stroked my hair and said that i'm not as fucked up as she is. that i talk. I can't even begin to talk to you...... I just want to curl up and go to sleep. I want to cry........... I want to shrivel up into some unrecognizable object. I don't fucking want to feel anymore..... i try so hard to be a good friend... but it never works. i'm not the one who starts shit. you're the one who always finds something to be angry about. you turn people against me. with my mother thinking i talk to her, i feel more alone... more unnoticed. am i really THAT insignificant? I wanted to hurt her. bludgeon her with the bag, throw the film into her fucking head and hope it stays... smear the acidic eyeshadow in her face, hold her down and rip her apart with my fingernails. I wanted blood. i only say what i hear. i only say what i know. i didn't say thief. i hate myself for ever thinking i could make anything work. I want mommy to go to work... i want to be alone