I hurt so much. If I cut off all of the hurty parts, would I feel better? "Some people have the gift of reaching right into your soul and finding the hole and making it bigger" I ate at five today. Yay for me and going 24 hours without food. I cant stand myself. My nose is bleeding profusly. I didnt notice untill a trickle of blood dripped into my mouth. I dont mind that taste. For you, you who know who you are, this is for you. Hello again my feathered friend who lived down by the sea. I saw her fly up in the sky looking so glad and free. I waved and smiled she looked so wild above the swirling sea. She said "Good day" and I turned away from the sun that was burning me. Wings took flight again and turned up to heaven never for me to see. Feel happy you feather thing you. Watching little spiders slide from flower to flower on their silver string. Watching them make homes for themselves among the roses. Watching the shiny thread glint in the evening sunlight, and wave in the warm breeze. Simplicity at its finest. Laying on the floor. Bleeding from too many wounds. Bruised, beaten. Hush now, dont try to revive yourself. Poor heart, this is how it feels like to love and not be loved. "I am a monkey behind glass turn the lights on have a laugh get up you filthy thing and dance" He called me today. We talked. I miss him. I seem to be forgetting his taste, the way his hands feel on my skin, the way he holds himself. I dont want to forget. Those are the only good memories I have to hold on to right now. I cant lose them. Silly girls, trying to live teenage dreams. romantic dances, hot guys, wanting to be together for ever. Romeo and Juliet where pathetic. There is no such thing as love, lust makes the world go round. I used to be loved. I used to be wanted. What happened? Maybe I wasnt ever loved or wanted. Maybe they just pitied me. Can you take me back? "Prima Donna your song shall live again, you took a snub, but there's a public who needs you..." I hate life right now. You only realize that all of your problems are fixable right before you kill yourself. Too bad. Ha! You want to know who he is! Sorry ladies, the answer is no. Stop asking. Swimming in a deep green pool. Your hair sways in the soft current. Your eyes struggle to stay open under the water. You see things that feet only see. Oh no, out of breath. I know he only wants what I can give to him. He doesnt have any feelings for me. I dont want to get in trouble though. His friends are my... friends. You live in Logan. I am grounded. You will have to wait for me. Maybe no one will find out. Ok, consequinces dully noted, I am ready for you. "Past all thought of “if” or “when” No use resisting Abandon thought and let the dream descend" I guess I will go now. Farewell dear void. in the name of the girl