Get up. Lick your wounds. Start again. That is the only choice. I am not the master of this game as I think I am. I am just a pawn. You may think I am a huge ordeal, a horrible undertaking. But I am just a small stepping stone in everyones life. You have to take me. You have to take that first small step to take the rest. Climb the pyramid. You can only say no so many times before you cant speak. You can only scream if someone is there to hear you. And my mind is full of things. I am full of things I dont understand... I dont understand why I am this way. Breathing quickens and becomes harder Tears well up I just need to mellow. I'll be ok. I am getting help. The crazy kind of help. Maybe I am off center. I need someone to figure out my head. Back to the old poems. Devils and Angels. Heartbreaks and friends. You'll never escape that. My mother is putting me on a diet... appearently I am unhealthy. I prolly wont hurt, it is just a pain in my ass. Its like as soon as you hear the word diet you want to go out and buy the biggest most-unhealthy fast food burger you know of and eat it while rolling around in golden grease-spattered fries... and laughing at all those dieting fools. Ah man. I look back and see few people change. I think I have changed, I feel changed. For better or worse? Both.