"suffocating in my own stupidity, hating beautiful people, hiding in the dark." my good qualities: ... none my bad qualities: obnoxious, annoying, stupid, retarded, trusting, and much much more... I hate people. I feel magnificently beautiful in the dark by myself. I feel horrendously ugly in the light with others. My shadow can sometimes make me feel beautiful, but it is distorted. I hate the beautiful people. I hate people who will go to extremes in order to get other peoples attention. I hate people who will play with your emotions, lie to you, steal your feelings. I hate being guilty. I hate being hypoctritical. I hate watching beautiful people prance around like god damned unicorns, rearing dramtically, shaking their beautiful manes, shining happily in the sunlight. I hate the light. I hate how people judge others based on looks... I hate being hypocritical... I hate people who know how they will be judged. I hate people who say they are your friend, and then turn away from you. I hate people who use others. I hate people. I hate beauty. I hate myself. Hate seems to be a strong word... but its not. I hate being punished for a crime I didnt commit. I hate being laughed at for my crimes. I hate being me... I hate me... I hate people and beauty... I hate life. A dark figure on the asphalt. Beautiful it seems. Ugliness lies within physical boundaries. "Its whats inside that counts". Liers think they know everything. Him:Whats wrong? Me:Nothing. Him:I dont beleive you, is there anything that I can do to help? Me:I dont know. Is there? Him:If I knew what was wrong... I am sorry that you feel however you are feeling... Me:I dont want worthless sorries, I dont like sympathy. Him:ok Me:I dont feel like talking to people right now. He couldnt have done anything, it wasnt his fault. Her:He wants to be your boyfriend. Me:Oh. Her:He is sad that you dont like him as much as he likes you. Me:Oh. Her:He doesnt know how much you care. Me:I dont want a boyfriend, I dont know how much he likes me or cares about me. Show me first and then I will react, untill then I will continue being a bitch to everyone I see. Her:You make him sad. Me:I dont want to. The Sam effect I beleive its called, some people can tell others that they hate them and the others are immediatly attracted, tell others that you like them and they go away. Him:I really wish I could help, but if I cant thats fine. *starts to walk off, I run up and grab his arm* Me:He is pissing me of, She is pissing me off, combined they piss the whole fucking world off. I missed you, I like you, you dont understand how much I care about you. I am angry, and sad, I hate people and life. The end. Him:I dont know what to say Me:... Him:Well, thankyou. Damn, I expressed my feelings. That is going to come back and bite me in the ass. I hate it when I am pressured into telling people how I feel or what I think. Me:People dont expect you to be fucking anything! If you where pissed then we would have accepted it. Some of us thought that you where trying to get attention, others thought that it was their fault. Even though your pissiness did seem to spread this time, the world does not fucking revolve around you! Life goes on, and people will hopefully get over themselves. Her:Look, I dont know why I was pissed. I hadnt been pissed in while and I didnt know I would get all of the attention! Me:"I think I will be mad at everything because I havent done that in a while! I dont know, maybe I will even get some attention!" Her:I was just pissed ok? Call it a need for attention, call it hormones, I was just pissed. What? Like you havent been pissed for no apperent reason? Me:Like when? And if I have then have you ever bothered to ask why I was pissed? Have you ever bothered to pull yourself out of yout perfect world where everyone loves you and cares about you and down to my level, try to even understand what I am feeling? Her:I don't want to argue with you becuase it probably end up not good and I don't want us hating each other...I'm sorry if you needed someone to talk to..I know I once promised I would always be there and I haven't been...so If I see you being pissed I'm going to ask what's wrong...please don't bite my head off if I do try to understand whats going on with you. Me:Dont ever pull that shit again. *I proceed to bawl my head off* Her:Ok, I promise I wont, are we good? *gives me a hug* I am SO sorry for being stupid tonight, I promise never to do it again. I love you! Me:ok *continues to cry* Drama, drama, drama... I hate telling my friends the truth. I hate it when they "love" me away from punishing them. I know their love is false, so do they... we pretend. Him:Did she really meen it? Me:I dont know, I dont care, I dont feel like dealing with her right now. Him:Sometimes thats you can do. Now back to fact that he wants to be my significant other. One) I dont know if I feel that way about him. Two) I dont want a boyfriend. Three) He hasnt shown me how much he likes me. Love is dead, but the pain of supposed love is very much alive. The good cancels out the bad. There is no point. Curled in a corner, letting the world go on around me. I dont need to experience things, to grow, I dont need to feel. I dont need life. I dont need... In the name of the needy