i woke up, and i had had a dream that turned for the worst. it went something like i was sitting alone at a lunch table, he was at the one next to mine with my friends, he sat next to me and kept looking right into my eyes, our legs brushed and he freaked out, telling me theres no way we can ever be together again. but as we were walking down the hall, he was pinching my back really hard, but we were laughing. ... of course as i was almost done in the shower my mom informs me that school is closed. seriously. and i went to bed late last night. i figured i might as well make myself useful, so i shoveled my ass off and made twenty bucks. theres no chance of me falling back asleep once ive woken my ass up in the shower. no school, no midterms. are they going to cancel the NYC trip tommarow? if they do, there going to become part of the ground. ive been waiting and ive been hella anxious to go. i'm going to go shovel at my grama's house with my brother in a little while. why not right? might as well earn the money instead of just getting it handed to me. later lovers. hope unknown, sometimes just waking is surreal. this day never seems to end. this pain, never. this rage i can't let go. now everyone, do you know? i know your deception.