Update more later but, very bad morning so far, all I do it get bitched at and dumped on, EVERYONE, My family, my friends, my jobs, I got a horrible voice message this morning, I can't do this anymore. I can't deal with this guilt. All I do is make things worse for everyone. I'm off to the gym, iys going to be a long day, split shift doubles well at least I'll get to go to the gym twice, I am trying so hard, I hate this. Things just have to get better. They have too.