July 27th 2004 6:43 pm My hands are still shaking from the pain. I abuse myself in me vs. punching bag. I won. I got my anger out and I feel better. Although I'm still somewhat pissed. Another one of my friends likes or in this case she "loves" one of my ex-b/fs and she didn't tell me until today. Last night me and him flirted and stuff online. And now she's pissed at me. I don't want to stay mad b/c it might cost me a friendship but damn its not my fucking fault. I'm the one that is suppose to be hurt/upset/angry. And it was really none of her business. He told her. I don't care if they date but she should have told me. Last time I was this pissed when my ex Matt broke up with me on yahoo messenger. I was so pissed I punched the mirror and messed up my wrist. I had to keep a brace on it for 3 weeks. It was 1st semester last year. Damn it I'm still pissed. Why can't I just be a guy? I'd so be homosexual (well bisexual). Since I am now it wouldn't be any different. lol. I'm leaving tomorrow. Wish me luck! Bye for now. Back in a few days.--