Today, I had the best conversation ever with God. Well, it wasn't really a conversation...I just realized and admitted some of my biggest mistakes. For example, 3 monthes ago, I basically quit at everything on purpose, out of spite because I was angry with God. So angry, that I quit writing to him and reading the Bible for 3 monthes...it didn't help at all. My life didn't improve...I was basically always angry. Let's just say, that the reason I was mad at God was all my fault. This is because I would read the Bible and complain (to God) that it was too hard to read so many chapters a day...but the truth was he wasn't making me read so much, I was setting goals (for example: 20 chapters by Tuesday) and would go for that goal and when I couldn't do it, I would complain to God. Then I got angry because it wasn't getting any easier. On Sunday, because I slept over Sophia's on Saturday, I went to church with them which I really wanted to do, because I wan't to renew my relationship with God, so I listened to the sermen and when the priest said, "Why do we hide from God and avoid him at times? Is it because of fear, anger?" And I realized for me it was fear that I would fail again and give up on myself and blame God for it...so I suddenly wasn't afraid anymore once I admitted it to God. Now, I'm writing to him, and reading the Bible more. My goal to finish the Bible my Thanksgiving has been cancelled because I know that if I work for that goal, I'll just get tired of reading and quit again, because making goals won't motivate me to read more. It's the fact that it will bring me closer to God that will motivate me to keep reading!