everyday i seem to be becoming more and more content with the person that i am. i don't care to let the words of others bring me down. yesterday i felt really good about myself. lots of people in my family were saying such kind things to me, and i had a few realizations.

i'm not ashamed of anything from my past that makes me seem shallow or low or immature because i've grown since then. i've grown enough to be able to admit the things about myself that no one would want to admit. and i'm thankful that i am the way that i am. i feel like all of the people whose opinions and judgements used to cloud over me are actually beginning to see me and genuinely have nice things to say about me as a person, not about my life as a placeholder because its not like that anymore. the only place i hold is my own.

there are such ugly people in this world. in my opinion, those people are not strong enough to deal with the emotions of others so they resort to saying the things that will make them feel better about themselves and their ability to get another person back.

yesterday, the other realization i had was that, though it may seem unfortunate, the way i want to be and the way that i am notably beginning to be is that of a person who has the respect and integrity to not seek a futile, empty revenge in petty situations just to ease my own frustration. and so that's the only downside, i have to deal with my own frustration when another person's immaturity and cattiness pisses me off. but that's where my strength comes from, and that's why i say those who resort to the low, immature measures of empty, shallow words do not have the strength to rise above it all.

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feelin' good. eatin' christmas leftovers, and goin' on an adventure with my friends in an hour or so.

happy anniversary, you.