today was great. simply just great. though summer felt nonexistant and coming back to school felt extremely old, i had a great day. my classes this semester. i have spanish first, spanish IV honors. there are six people in the class including me, all girls, and the teacher, she's cool, but her jokes don't get laughed at all too much which can be awkward. i think we'll get along fine though. then i have intro to art. it's usually what underclassmen take but i wanted mah art and luckily i have one friend to endure it all with me, and that class should be a nice touch to the rest of my college level schedule. next i have AP lit. it should be fine. just as challenging if not less than AP comp only cause the teachers are completely different. i have my buddies in that class, so i'm not all that worried but i have to go to a meeting tonight because of my AP classes. lastly, AP environmental science. again only six kids :] and i much prefer environmental stuff to physics. blech. hopefully val will join that class. she's stressed about her schedule right now because she hates physics and environmental stuff is her forte, so ya, she should join. i'm very happy because every other day opposite of science i'm going to have an independent study for photography. so i can just chill and print and do whatever i want every other day and make pictures :] yay. and i now have two college recommendations in the works. feelin good. senior year will be tough but it had a great start. _________ i was with jake from monday to tuesday. in a nutshell, i feel i understand him more. he had, we had a bit of a meltdown on monday night. but i think it made me understand him more and i will try harder to do what i need to do for him, for me, and for us. that night was great after that. he was very understanding of me and never got upset with me when i got emotional. ha. because i knew i would. tuesday, yesterday, was great! jake and i, it felt like a year ago because we were walking all over south portland doing the same things we did last summer. goin on our adventures. we went to chuckie cheese. it was my first time :] we met up with his mom at jcpenny. they let me try on dresses for fun. haha. homecoming preparation though i have no money for that. then we all went to the beach, his whole family minus his brother. that was a lot of fun. jake was so happy. it's all i could have ever asked for. his smile was real and he couldn't stop talking about what a great day he was having and he was being so loving to me. his mom, when we were alone, told me that if only i lived with them, jake could be happy all the time. ha. i don't know if i'd give myself so much credit. it made me happy too. i feel things going up from here. i'm not going to jinx it but i'm excited and i'm content and i'm not giving up on jake. or us. or myself. i just had a really great day. and i miss jake. and i love him. the end.