Woke up at 6:30 on a Sunday morning to going quading with poppsy. You know, father-daughter type bonding and all that corny stuff. Like I said, or didn't say earlier, pappsy and I have done a lot of that lately. The off-roading adventure was a good one though. I had never gone before, but it's exactly like riding a sea-doo, minus the water. I ran into a tree though. I was zooming down a path and came to a fork in the road. I think I decided at the last minute to go left and, well, couldn't get the bike to make up it's mind fast enough and crashed into a Palo Verde. Now, the supersticous Me might take that as a sign. A fork in the road and me not knowing which way to turn. Ok, it's not just a sign, it's exactly what I'm facing. I just hope I don't crash. You want to hear the most pathetic thing in history? About two years ago (my frosh year in high school) I met this guy on the internet role playing. (If you don't know what rp is, that's probobly a good thing. And if you do know, don't hold that against me). Anyways, we start talking and to make a long, loooong story short, we destroyed each others lives. He says he fell in love with me, which I refuse to believe because we never met. We argued a lot, he made me feel like shit a lot, apparantly I did the same to him, and we went for long periods at a time without speaking. Five months ago was supposedly the last time we were going to talk. Five days ago I get a reply from another journal I used to have and it's from him. SO I ask him what the hell he was doing and he starts to throw in my face all his wonderful occurences, yada yada. Basically being an ass-hole. Anyhow, to make another long story short, we ended with "let's just be friends again, I'll talk to you later". Fine. But now I question, as much as I thought about him in our silence, do I really want to try to make this friendship work, or was I ok with nothing? At 8:30 tonight I could hardly keep my eyes open. Ten minutes later I went to bed. Five minutes later my mum came in and kissed me good night. Three minutes later I hear shouts down the hall. And about one minute after the shouts ended, I got out of bed. I'm dead tired but I can't sleep. Why? Because I feel like I'm being flushed down the toilet. Ok, bad anologie. Here's a better one: I feel like my life is working backwards. Everything I strived so hard to get away from last year is now returning in full throtle. Boys, I love you to death, but men I can't stand. Isn't that ironic? Enough said. And I swore I wasn't going to let this journal get personal. *sigh* Carrie