Everyone is a member of a gym!! Or has access or something! I swear, everyone I talk to is working out, just got done working out, about to work out...the whole desert plane has turned work-out world! Not that that's a bad thing. Actually, I'm jealous. I wish I had money for a gym membership. Whenever I get pissed off or really motivated (strange polars, no?) I always feel like working out. Nothing like being sore and sweaty when you're PMSing. ^.^ (aww, did that make you feel uncomfortable fellas?) OK, SO, You ever get to the point where you've just 'had it'? I mean, you really just can't take it any more, whatever 'it' may be? I'm talking about all those other times when you've given in, surrendered, did what you were told, or just sank into because you didn't have the power to tell your self otherwise? Yeah, well, I'm there. I've just had it with a lot of things and I know all the remedies. First of all, I'm done with school. So sick and tired of it, I just don't give a blick any more. No worries though, I'm still getting all my stuff done, I'm just not stressing over anything. Not any more. Not in high school. Actually, I'm sick of stressing out in general. I'm giving it up for lent--that's right, I'm giving up stress for lent. And why not? It's a band thing, so bye-bye it goes. I'm sick of telling myself 'one more won't hut'. Yes it will. One is a big number. One bad decision is equal to a hundred bad decisions without something to counter the first. And even if I can counter it, it gets me no where. So, no longer will I tell myself 'it's okay'. It's not okay, and it's going to get fixed goddamnit. Starting now. On a brighter side, I love handbells. Unlike other rehearsals I go to, handbells is one rehearsal I never ever dread or don't feel like going. On the contrary, I always look forward to it and would rather cut other things in order to be there. I don't even know why that is. I guess every now and again it's just a huge relief for me to find a new escape--No, not an escape--an enjoyment; yes, that's the better word for it. And it is an enjoyment. I painted my nails last night. I don't know why, but that made me very happy. UHg, I sound like such a girl...moving on. Yeah...move on...I can do that... Carrie