Today was supposed to be an awful day. It was just in the cards. But somehow, at the end of it I'm not only standing, I'm smiling. I managed to skip through the day dodging dilemmas, and even The Three aren't going to bring me down. I don't know if that's because I've finally learned how to put things into perspective, or if my mother is right when she says that things happen for a reason, or if I haven't just developed a slight case of apathy. It began this morning in French. Apparently we had an assignment due that the teacher didn't even mention, and so the majority of the class didn't do it, much less know about it. But no worries, the teacher didn't collect it and said she probably wouldn't collect it until Friday. The first break, but not Number One. After French on Mondays I go straight over to the Blaze for news updates. Sit, read, edit, kill time, read, edit, sit...Someone asked about directors, I said I hadn't heard yet, subject dropped. I edited a story for one of my residents for her journalism class, studied for my media research methods retake exam, and two hours later I came back to my room. Saw Kris, grabbed lunch, check email, schedule, made phone calls, and then off to take the exam. That went okay. I felt sufficiently prepared, at any rate. Back to the Blaze for Press Pass. There were barely any stories on the board because people skipped out on their updates, and since I had fortunately decided to bring my laptop today, I sat down and punched out a few stories to help them. One of the anchors frustrated me, as usual, pressed for time and barely kicking out enough stories, time to air. In the booth and here is Number One. During the show, (I'm board-opping), Sam came in, more troubled than usual. Sam's not a very energetic guy. He always seems to have something heavy and pressing on his mind and it doesn't seem like he's slept for days. Nonetheless, I have an enormous amount of respect for him and suck-up his every word. What can I say, he's my mentor for the Blaze and if it weren't for him, I probably wouldn't still be there. Well, maybe, I don't know. Anyway. The point. He said something about being disappointed when he saw the list of directors for next year, the list which did not include my name. He didn't know I hadn't heard yet, but that was okay because I think I would have rather had heard it through him than in the email I later opened. At any rate, he expressed his disappointment with the selections, especially that I wasn't selected, and felt that the station was slipping down the pipe and that all his work was to no prevail. It was very dramatic. He also confided to me some stuff about school, which surprised me about him. I told him he ought to take his tired and upset-self home and drink a milkshake because milkshakes heal all wounds. I hope he didn't take my lightheartedness the wrong way, but I was still running Press Pass at the time and having a real conversation while listening for cues isn't so easy. Anyway, that was Number One. After the show, I immediately called the one person I know I can always call when I need to vent; Kris. But when I began to explain to him what had happened, I realized that I wasn't really angry. I wasn't really that upset either. Yes, I would have loved the job and I would still take it if for some reason the selected person backed out, but the only part of the whole deal that really bothered me was how confident other people were that I would get it. It's in the bag, they had said. Nevertheless, I'll still be at the Blaze next semester and maybe not having the position will help me concentrate on other things; instead of helping up-and-coming freshmen and sophomores improve their skills, I'll let the potential competition figure it out on their own and work to improve my own talents. Selfish? That's journalism. After that the day slowed down a little. I had a nice, healthy dinner, got some breathing time, watched a bit of the news, and finally it was time for my public speaking class. And the Number Two. I walked into class with the sinking sensation that I had a speech to give although I hadn't planned on speaking until next week. Sure enough, I come to find that I am supposed to speak. So I sit and sweat through the first speeches, rapidly pulling at threads of information in my brain to come up with *something* to say. By the time the girl before me began her speech, I had developed an introduction, remembered the skeleton of my outline and some vague facts I had researched, and had pulled some other experiences and facts I knew from real life experience. Sure, I could wing this. And then someone tapped my arm. The kid behind me handed me a folded piece of paper. It was from our teacher. It said that he would put me up first for next week, that since I came to class, he believed it was an honest oversight. *Phew* I let my body relax and actually paid attention to the remaining speeches. 8pm, plenty of time until my desired bedtime, I keep up my recent motivation and put on my work-out clothes. Downstairs for my bike, begin to ride, and then suddenly realize that my bike has been a lot more difficult to ride today. Sure enough, Number Three, the back tire's pretty squishy. But the gym is a fair distance from the hall and I don't want to walk alone at night, so I peddle harder and ride with a semi-flat. It wasn't too bad. Besides, I absolutely love to ride my bike. Good work out; got the arms shaking and the stomach hurting. I managed to end the day standing; on top. So now I'm ready for a fresh start tomorrow and will be waiting for the something that stands behind "things happen for a reason." Carrie PS - I ate Rice Chex for breakfast. They were amazing.