So much for getting a job at Joannes. If they call me tomorrow, they can forget it, because this waiting business is ridiculous. I'll try elsewhere--tomorrow. It feels like the end of school, and it practically is--all I have to do is blink and next thing I know, they'll be playing Pomp and Circumstance. As the third quarter draws to a close and big events unwravel, or continue to press on, I find myself where I shouldn't be: at home, doing nothing. This is so unlike me. And it makes me sad to be here, knowing everyone else is there--making music, creating characters; key roles in "the highschool experience". Speaking of characters, a tangent, if I may: In theatre we're doing monologues, which I may or may not have said. I did mine today. And let me say without an ounce of modesty that I did awesome and that it was the punch in the face that I've been waiting to give to Townsend for quite some time now. I went up there, claimed my space, moved my arms, raised my voice, and became Tassie Manson (the character in the monologue). And when I finished, T looked at me and said something of a compliment, and I could hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes that he was sorry. That sounds cruel, but it isn't because we've discussed it. He even said to me that he could tell the part was personal because, like Tassie, I went into an audition and was misjudged. Picked-over, I'd call it. I think what bothers me so much about the whole thing (and will bother me immesnely when I actually go and see the show) is that I have so much creative mind and see things in such and such a way, that I almost CRINGE when someone does it less. It makes me angry that I can't take the same damned character and make it bigger, better, even. And all this sounds so damned conceited, but I can't help it, I can't. As a creator of characters, it bothers me to watch an 'okay' portrayel. Well then, that's enough of that. I don't want to give it away entirely that I'm a riteous bitch. "So that was my day. Now how the hell was yours?" Carrie