It was the first time in 2 years I questioned, doubted, or held reservations. I think I got scared. Happiness is deceiving; deceiving when it comes, deceiving when it goes. That's why you don't realize what you have until it's gone. Committment is giant leap; larger than man's step on the moon, for they'd be coming back. But a long time ago, without even being cognizent of the decision, I surrendered the possibility of some other future and chose this one. I don't regret it, never have and don't think I ever will. This wasn't a fight, this wasn't a fall-out, this was a test. Are you happy? Do we pass? It was the first time in two years I took my self out of the picture, didn't see us through on-lookers eyes, didn't resolve a feeling from a photograph. It was terrifying; like seeing the end of the world in front of you when you finally believed the earth was round. One more step and I would have been gone. But I didn't plunge. I think before I leap, usually. Maybe I didn't the first time, but that first fall was nice; fast, happy and untamed. The next time I fell--if there would be a next time--it would hurt, a lot, and I think I have enough scars. I didn't jump. But I turned and saw things a little more clearly. We're not perfect. No one is. But the bottom line is that we're always trying. There's love and compassion, and as long as we keep holding on, nothing comes between.