Well my life pretty much sucks. Yesterday My parents went to Vegas nite and stuck me with Katie. They said they'd be home at 9:30....they showed up at 11:30 both drunk off of their ass's and bitchy as hell. My mom was on my ass the entire night "Stay off that net".....two words for her...Fuck off! gawd....I was havin suicidal thoughts yesterday. I dunno why but V-day has always been depressing. Scott sent me an email that said Happy V-day....It really made my day. He can be such a sweetheart at times. I updated my site, found 2 poems I musta written and forgot about, Whatca think Often I wonder why people say everything is going to be alright When they dont have to worry about your fights The Physical and Emotional Hell That you wrestle with day and nite The Nightmares you live, The Pain And they wonder why you're startin to go insane The Argueing, The Voices, The stress I wonder if this is a test A test of my Patience and Will Of Love and skill My cards are down I dont wanna stay around I'm sick of everything, of it all I'm making this call I've decided I'm done You all have won I see no reason to go survive I no longer wish to stay alive So I've decided suicide is the way I wont live another day You all look down on me and think what a shame That she couldn't keep her emotions tame Well I'll let you in on a secret of mine See this smile, makes ya think i'm fine But Its all a disguize The truth is in the eyes The Sorrow, the Pain, The Hate And the Mystery of my fate Pay attention and maybe you'll see the Voices that torture me Yes I cut myself during the night So i can keep up this fight So i can live another day And you wanna put me away? Why? So You can say you tried Ha Can't stop suicide Obviously It's my destiney I can accept it why can't you? There's nothing you can do It chose me so i must go I won't be missed I know I'm out of your grip And Starting my trip I Slit my wrists and Wonder Why Exist Why Stay alive Why try to survive? We're all gonna die So why Not push things along Sing death's song Take your turn Venture into the land of no return Anyways I g2g evil parents