Needing to hold on to something.....To Anchor what little sanity I have left. These past 2 days Man they realli did me in. I would like to know what exactly is going on between Scott and Me. I mean like I have no idea.....These are the last things he's ever said to me.... Scott(2:47:19 PM): tell me you and mander are playin a joke on me Scott (2:47:37 PM): yall have "owed me on" Scott (2:47:41 PM): ^one Me (2:47:59 PM): huh? Me (2:49:40 PM): ya lost me hun Scott (2:50:36 PM): i am lost i suppose also Me (2:50:56 PM): two natural blonds Scott (2:52:26 PM): ya definitely really got me. really got me good. Me (2:52:49 PM): alright.....what are we talkin about? Scott (2:58:38 PM): i am clueless on how to handle my pain Scott (2:58:38 PM): on how to handle this situation Me (2:58:56 PM): what situation Scott (2:59:15 PM): i have NEVER been this depressed Me (2:59:29 PM): whats wrong? Scott (3:00:20 PM): that pic was/is supposed to be you Scott (3:01:24 PM): and all of a sudden, out of the blue, it is not? Scott (3:01:36 PM): THAT girl is not you? Scott (3:01:53 PM): after months that have turned into years Me (3:02:47 PM): well.....never thought we'd realli stay friends Scott (3:05:07 PM): it's like what if i out of the blue showed you who i really was and showed another pic Me (3:07:31 PM): tru i guess.....stupidity on my part Scott(3:10:14 PM): i cannot handle this kind of change Scott(3:10:52 PM): i think i am gonna crawl back into my shell Me (3:11:28 PM): I'm sorry for causing this *-Hugs- Scott(3:12:18 PM): i am numb. and bout as close to ,, that i have ever been Scott (3:13:04 PM): i think i am gonna unplug. Scott(3:14:22 PM): goddammit Scott (3:14:32 PM): i dont know how i am gonna recover from this Me (3:15:17 PM): seriously i'm sorry. i never thought we'd become such close friends and then i totally forgot about that pic Scott (3:21:43 PM): oh shit here come the tears Me (3:22:26 PM): Scott, I'm realli truly sorry..... Scott (3:22:51 PM): it's ok Scott (3:22:58 PM): but i am weeping Scott (3:23:07 PM): but not your fault Scott (3:23:16 PM): i ama delusional sort Me (3:23:55 PM): actually it is my fault. I used to play those stupid sex chat games. I shouldnt have lied about the pic.... longbranch_pennywhistle (3:39:47 PM): ya ok>? Scott (3:44:02 PM): cant stop weeping Scott (3:46:10 PM): Amy Marie Bremner? Due to personal reasons, I, Jeffrey Scott Roberts, will no longer be able to provide you with emotional support, etc. Me (3:47:56 PM): thats okay Me (3:48:35 PM): all good things come to an end Scott (3:49:54 PM): i'll never forget you. you will always be in my heart. in a special place. always and forever. Me(3:50:42 PM): love ya scott....thank you for making my life worth living Scott (3:52:43 PM): man i cant breath. better lay down Scott (3:52:58 PM): bye I guess maybe I took this to lighty. I guess basically what this is all about is I'm not the girl in the pic i originally sent but I can only apologize so many times for my actions from when I was 12. I'm sorry I'm not his dream girl. I can try But I don't think He'll ever talk to me again. Gawd.....I'm crying again. I have my music turned up. I feel like Hell I look Like Hell. This is just one big mess....And I'm afraid to Instant message him. I dunno why. I just don't want to hurt him anymore then i already Have. This entire thing is all My fault. I know it is. I just hope he doesn't do anything stupid. Dammit. Fucking Asshole I am. I Love him always will. People are like why would you love him if you two aren't talking. I've spent every day talking to him for like 2 1/2 yrs rambling on about stupid stuff...movie reviews He's always been there to talk. And Like I won't forget that. I can't. He's such a big part of my life. Ya kno. And now that it's missing I feel like a Puppy who was took to the pound. It's like a whole new environment. Seeing things in a different light. No else understands tho.....Scott if you read this....I Love you! And I'm so sorry.........