I think I'm gonna puke. What do I want? Why am I still here? I don't get it. I'm such a stupid little girl. Why do I want this so badly..? I can justify everything in my head. That doesn't take away shame or regret. How can it all be expected and justified to him? I'll never be able to explain it all. Why I care, why I don't. Why some things piss me ff so fucking much. Why things I say that piss him off so much didn't really mean anything. I can be spiteful or petty without really meaning it, just like you. But I don't take kindly to betrayal or consistant stupidity. Eventually it wears on me until I just don't want to have anything to do with it anymore. Six damn months... More, really. When can we really count from. I remember a year ago... it hurt so much more than this. I didn't care for him as much. But it hurt more. Still... Maybe I'm hardened from last year. Just love me damnit! Why can't it just be that simple? ...maybe I should go. God damnit! This is all fucking bullshit! What did I do wrong? Fuck that! Fuck you all. I try so fucking hard to make you happy, you tell me to be selfish, when I am you stab me in the back. So fuck you. Words are meaningless And forgettable Enjoy the silence...