Hm... what to say? Everything outside feels new and fresh. I'm becoming social again. I feel comfortable with some new people. I dunno... everything inside feels... writhey. Kinda sick and all jumbling around. I'm starting to miss aspects of my old life. Old friends, old activities... they feel so far away now. And its almost as if I'm scared to try and have them back for fear of ridicule. I guess its not really a big deal. I've found I can detach myself from most sentiments. I don't LIKE to, but I can. And my life NOW is more important. My life now. Wow. I don't really know how to try and describe how I feel about that. Horrified, maybe. Anticipatory? Hopeful. I saw my baby Shawn not long ago. He's gotten so big... I wonder if he knows me at all. I think he does... I wanna see him more, and his family of course. I guess I really need a car. And a job. Hm. gotta go. Bye!