I don't know what's worse. Knowing that your best friend hates homosexuals and bisexuals or the fact that you are a lesbian or bisexual. I've got these questions still burning in my mind. I don't know what happened, but one day, I fell in love with one of my closest friends. Now, she haunts me day and night. Yet, I still dream of my ex and the boy that mentally fucked with me. I don't know where I went wrong. But I do know this, I better hide it all away if I want to be accepted. -------------------- Hikari closed her journal. She sat on her bed, hiding in the darkness of her room. She had just told Anne that she might be bisexual. She told Mirtela the same, but the one that mattered, she told last. The one girl that had her thinking inside. "Can I love a girl?" she asked out loud. 'No, she's not a girl. She's a woman,' Hikari thought. Everything about this girl was right. The way her blonde hair moved. The way her blue eyes looked into her when they talked. The sound of her voice was now echoing through Hikari's mind. How she loved Christine. How her world was now revolving around her. Hikari fell back on her bed and sighed. "You're taking over me, Chris. I don't know how, but you are," she whispered. "How I wish I could be that girl by your side." Kari rolled over to her side. She had tried being gay once. In middle school, her best friend at the time tried it out. Her best friend hated it. Hikari felt like it was her. She should have known that that was going to be her in the future. She didn't think anything of it. Now, she was obsessing over a woman. "And she's been gay forever," Hikari said. "Why didn't I notice it earlier? Was it because of Tim? Was it Jason?" Nothing could answer the thoughts in Hikari's head. Only the sound of Chris's voice could calm her. That's what she needed right now. She needed Chris. She needed to be with Chris. ----------- I've never wrote gay fic. Let's see how this turns out. Well, since the fact that I might be gay...um...don't ask... Help me find my sweet suicide...Kari