Chapter 4: Haunting She was running again. The rain was colder than before. It froze her soul quicker then any other time. Tears were pouring from her eyes. Only to be froze by the rain. She could see her breath, shallow and white. ...Long lost words whisper slowly to me. Still can't find what keeps me here. When all this time I've been so hollow inside. I know you're still there... Memories of when she used to be happy. She could remember when she lost him. Everything seemed to revolve around him. She wasn't obsessed with him anymore. She couldn't be, could she? ...Watching me. Wanting me. I can feel you pull me down. Fearing you. Loving you. I won't let you pull me down... How she hated him. He had ruined what was left of her happiness. She couldn't smile anymore. She couldn't dream anymore. All she could do was to have these constant nightmares with her running in cold rain. She waited to hear his voice yelling for her. It always did. She could always count on that. ...Haunting you. I can smell you - alive. Your heart pounding in my head... "Kari!" There it was. She knew that she would stop. She knew that he would take her into his arms and tell her that he loved her. Kari hated this. How she wished that she could jump into the dark sea. How she wished that she could fall forever. ...Watching me. Wanting me. I can feel you pull me down. Saving me. Raping me. Watching me... "Kari!" She stopped and let him take her. It was always the same. She would stop and refuse him. Then she would run and wake up, never knowing what would happen. That was how it was. She would never know what was at the bottom of that hill she ran down to escape him. --------- I hate to say it, but I still love him. I still want him. I'm still obsessed. I just wish I could get away from him, but he still haunts my dreams. He still has all of me... Help me find my sweet suicide...Kari