umm ...... i keep saying it. ouch. it hurts a little. i really want to talk to kyle. on the phone. cuz. even if we arent saying anything i still like the fact of him being on there. just.. being there. i miss him right now. but hes pissed at me or something. again. i dont know. cuz i cant hang out i guess. sorry. really. i read his last blog. he says hes losing interest. in what? me? i supposed. thats how i take it. that hurts. a lot. how am i supposed to take it? i do love him. and the more ive been thinking about it lately i think i might be IN love with him. i think its too late though. if hes talking like that. (sigh) and that bitch heather. fuck her. her whole... if "it" doesnt make you happy then fuck "it" bullshit that makes me upset cuz i dont know if that was inteded at me. im sick of all these riddles and people saying this shit to him behind his back. kyle should make his own decision based on what kyle wants. not what heather, mike, dave, ... anyone tells him to do. i dont know. i cried a little when he hung up with me. he said he was "wasting time" being on the phone with me, cuz he had to find something to do tonight. ouch. wasting time. i guess im just a waste of time for him anymore. my own boyfriend. ouch.