Life seems so weird at the moment, but my mind has gone blank about feelings & thinking. I said yes to Tom yesterday so now we're 'going out' but it doesn't feel that way to me, i feel uncomfortable at school about it all & everyone knows about it. He's so happy that we are but i'm not, i find myself pretending that i am, but really i don't feel right about it. He loves me loads but i don't love him & i don't really know how i feel but its not love & ok i'm giving it a go but i don't think its gonna work, at least we can say we tried. I think I mainly just want the attention & to be loved, but cos its not a two way thing with Tom i feel uncomfortable around him now, we were good friends before anyway, which at least means i can talk to him about how i feel about most things, so he knows that i'm not sure about it. Chris is now talking to me again now though, either cos i'm taken & no threat or cos he's got something to talk to me about i don't know. He was telling me all the things me & Tom need to do & talk about & i don't need that added pressure, i shall take it all my own way. I don't need lads in my life to mess me up; intentionally or not, i need to concentrate on my school work & my friends. AAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!