I've had a crap day but nobody gives a shit. it started off good, martin phoned to tell dad something and asked how i am & told me to have a good day. then i was just in a strangely good mood. we had to take our finance forms in today, my went ok actually, and then later i was stood talking to Patrick, and chris, and having a laugh and stuff, it was good. But then i went to speak to charlie about something, and she and stacy were in a room, i went in before realising that tom was there aswell, but thought i'd see how it went, well soon after i went over to charlie tom got up and walked out without even acknowleding me, and that HURT, and really upset me, i went out and literally nearly cried, i was pretty depressed for a while afterwards, but the only people who noticed and commented were heather and mcgonigle, and theyre just like he's not worth it etc, but i think he is, plus i feel to blame that he's got hurt, and that hurts aswell as the hurt that he doesnt want to know me. i went to the orthodontist later, this new brace is horrible, it doesnt fit properly and part of it digs into my gum :( may have to go back. anyway was walking back to school and passed charlie, had a brief chat - but then thats all we seem to do these days, then i saw tom ahead, went passed him, noticed that he delibrately averted his eyes and totally ignored me, so much for being civil to me, what fucking difference, he's still pretending i dont exist, and everytime its twisting the knife in the wound, and i dont know how to cope, i need someone to talk to but there is no one around, who might understand a little bit or hug me or somehow cheer me up. plus sam is being moody depressive extreme and now refusing to talk to anyone, not even me & that does worry me, some of the others are like thats good, but its not, he could do anything. Its just one bad day after another these days, and nothing gets better it just seems to get worse.