okay so I had a good day. and then a bad day. alright wednesday was actually really good, in laurels class we just graded two papers on the FCAT (florida writes test).. and then she told us how easy it was to get an awesome grade on it. Then in johns we had Photos for the year book, what we're allowed to do is go outside and do whatever pose we wanna do and no one cares. as long as its school appropriate. lexi got me sitting down, I liked it, we'll use it. then we had to do puzzles in johns. Me and my group mate had finished first so we got an extended break... Matti:But I gave up my break to go to the bathroom earlier.. remember? John(teacher):Yeah, but.. Just go outside. Matti:Eww your board is grody.. what is that marker residue? John:... Matti:Ima clean it.. Then Leave. John:What ever you say Matti. then for geometry we had a test and then spent the rest of the class talking away as we always do. Matt spent the night and we played maplestory(figures) it was a good day =) then today.. urgh.. okay so the mornings going great, matt and I get up in time, we get to school. awesome. Im a little extra abusive today.. and I just.. dont know why.. And I kept telling myself I needed to lighten up..but like..ignoring it.. and that was fucking with me some till finally they got mad at me. and then marcall came up and smacked me.. and that send me fucking pissed off at everything. To the point I had to leave the area or I was going to literally beat her till she screamed. I took refuge next to sarahs brother, who I dont talk to. Finally matt and lexi find me.. Im still pissed at the world. and they didnt seem to notice. wasnt there fault though, it was mostly mine. Then during dons class. I was actually opting to sit with matt, then Kenny asks me to sit with him, and im all "UGH"... and right when I make my decision to sit on the edge again at matts table the sub asks where Im sitting. and I pointed in the other direction, and he goes "Good" and looks at the projector that happened to be behind me and my fat ass head would of been in the way. Matt gets mad that I have to move, and im standing there telling him to just move back so we can still talk and he bluntly ignores it. and that still pisses me off.. so Im twice as pissed.. and Just wanting to be alone.. I went to the bathroom twice.. so I could get free.. I even cut in class..yeah..somthing I hadnt done in months.. I took out the tape dispencer blade and cut like twenty times across the hand.. I wasnt watching it, just feeling it.. I looked down...and I was bleeding everywhere.. even some on the note kenny and I was passing back. he didnt notice. so I went to the bathroom to wash it up. Made me feel so much more fucking better though I tell you. -Matti ------ Todays the field trip..maybe It'll get better. the trip was cool we went and watched African Americans dance and express alot of things. It was pretty memorial. Matt kept trying to sleep. Lexi and I drew on my skirt. we had fun -Matti