So yeah.. Im going to be changing my password.. and all sorts of shit because apparently Private didnt work.. and kevin got into my profile.. Or Lexi told him. which would be worse. so therefore Im hiding everything from everyone. and deleting all my friends. I'll leave them comments though. To make them feel better about my privating. So my secrets are my own and no one can comment and yeah.. I'll feel a little better about this.. I feel like Im pulling myself away from everyone and Im just..yeah.. I feel like my life is becoming.. horrible.. Everything is getting stacked up on me I just dont want to do it, no work.. nothing.. I want to lay in my bed and cry..and sleep.. and not to wake up.. and Im actually soon to commit suicide.. and no one cares..and no one knows.. and I just.. I dont know.. cease to exist. I was suppose to meet Shane today and hang out with jennifer. that hasnt happened and I doubt it will cause jennifer cant come over because of my brother. She walked up to my house and rang the doorbell. my brother answered saying I wasnt home and then she left. she then called me when she got to her house and started bitching at me for being in the laundry room doing my laundry to wear something clean for once. not my fault. or maybe it is. Jeremy was telling me about how I should start taking responsibility and stop blaming my shit on other people. so fine. its my fault. the end. New Password: [DELETED] -Matti ---------------- My heart hurts again.. the pain I get when Im depressed and want to cry.. and want a boyfriend..and want to be close and rubbing up against them and loving them.. I hate it.. I want it.. I need it.. Im so fucking alone.. Im so fucking sad..