I believe now that I only tell the group that I constantly want to see them in hopes of it actually working and when I do come to visit I feel like a weight has lifted off my shoulders. and that I'm healed. That’s shit. When I get over there I usually talk to Glasses for a little bit. We sat there while she smoked a cigarette and just talked for a few. I kept staring at the Chucky doll from Child's Play, which eventually lead to Glasses and I running around the yard with Chucky and the Cordless phone taking digital photos as if they were in love. It was really amusing. Bitchy and a group of people came home a few after that and we showed them the photos. Luckily Boy wasn't with them or I would of gone into a bi polar mode that no one wants to see from me. And Kid has been stuck dealing with my moods for the last few days. I called Kid up at around six thirty last night to talk to him because despite the fact that there were a million fucking people over, I felt alone. So we talked for a good half and hour before my mom picked me up and took me home. It always manages to come to the subject that I'm the only single gay guy in this town. which fucking sucks a lot. I mean seriously, there are people that don't even look like they like each other and yet they still force themselves to kiss and be happy. Here I am, singled out, and all I can do is sit there with Glasses and watch her smoke while we both talk about our boy problems. She's a heavy girl. but it doesn't look bad on her. Sometime while I was gone away in Tallahassee she shaved the back of her head so now she only has the front half, and she's become more instable, however much cooler, I like to talk to her as much as everyone else. No ones changed to me personally. Only physical things and needs have changed. I don't really have much to tell you today. I dunno. I mean I wanted to see Kid today because I'm being forced over to the Groups house and dressing up for Halloween, which I don't want to participate in anymore since Kid isn't going, and Boy will be there to make me feel a lot worse about my life. I'll end up getting extremely bi polar, making drama, and heading home with tears. I don't want to attend, but what else will I do with my life if I sit here in the house watching horror flicks and laying next to my dog?.. I feel extremely depressed.