well today was ok i guess. it was warm, sunshiny and pleasant out side for that pointless 'freild day' instead of rainy, dark and exciting like i was hoping it would be....well today was so wow. first liz was pissed at davy because davy kept walking of with elizabeth and leaving liz and racheal. and then brian got mad at davy because brian called elizabeth a slut and davy smacked him. so he was being a little asshole bitch about it and was mad at her for practically the whole thing. and then jesse broke up with amanda, or at least he wanted to. so he got mike and kady to do it, which was sort of dumb of him but he felt like an asshole for doing it because he wanted to break up with her but couldn't. and just before this happened...i was mad still because of liz and davy and brian and i was like you know what i dont like jesse i dont want him anymore and i was all mad and bitchy saying i didnt care and that i was over it and it was over and i got really upset. and then jesse wouldnt even talk to anyone and all of a sudden he got all mopey and depressed acting and i was sitting on the concrete with elizabeth and we were talking about sunshine...dont ask...and then i went over to sit by jesse who just sat down there by himself and he said that he felt like an asshole because he couldnt break up with his girlfriend and then i tried to make him feel better but it wasnt working that well because im not very good at that and then amanda came over and told jesse to break up with her to her face which i would have done the same thing if i was in her place. right before that though amanda came over to where i was sitting and said that someone said i hated her and i said no i didnt hate her because she didnt do anything wrong to me i have nothing against amanda she's cool. but anyways where was i...oh yes then she kept asking him to say it and devin kept asking him to get off his ass and do it and he just sat there with me and mike and i could tell it was hard for him but its nice to know that he isnt an asshole. then he walked away with amanda and did it finally and so now jesse is no longer with amanda which means he is single which means he might ask me out now which makes me anxious because im not sure if i want to. i've gotten so used to being alone and depressed im not sure if i could handle being happy and in a relationship. but then you know i just think what the hell. what happens happens and i'll just have to have fun with it. i guess. then devin was having some kindof problem and he was talking to jesse about it and then he seemed ok. and then jose is now going out with katy. another katy. who i really dont like. which shudnt make me upset but in a way it did...for some odd reason. and now for the good parts of the day. first i didnt have to do anything in any classes except first period. then while we were outside i got to hang out with everyone that i knew and then we played human jenga which was so awesome. well at least until david came and sat on all of us which made lisa fall off and then the rest of us kind of gave up i guess. but it was fun while it lasted. jose dressed up in a skirt today...my skirt... which he kept over the weekend. (i wonder what he will do with that...) then we put make up on him this morning (which was also mine) and then he put on some boots with heels at least four inches high, which were not mine and i dont know whose they were but he put them on. he didnt get introuble either which is dumb because devin got in trouble that day he wore a skirt and he wasnt even wearing hooker shoes or makeup, but it was probably because it was the day right after matt had left and so they were all still steaming over their proudness of being the superior to all of us on yet another unfair subject. miriah likes miguel, miguel is going out with kathy, jake wants to go out with samantha (i probably shoudnt have said any of that but i trust that anyone who read it can keep a secret *wink wink*) i want jesse but i feel somewhat wierd about it. my neck still hurts. not as much as yesterday but it hurts. but today was really quite awesome despite all of the eh, problems that went on. katrina brought me wheat thins which was so awesome and i wasnt expecting it because i didnt read those comments she left until about ten minutes ago. i will try and get ahold of matt and see if he can come over this weekend. saturday night im hoping to go to the movies with matt..maybe..and davy after i spend the whole entire day washing clothes because i havent washed clothes in about two weeks and im running out of clean stuff, and it takes all day because we dont have a working dryer. then maybe if im a good girl, or well if im lucky, or well wait i dont believe in luck. ok, ok, maybe sunday if i am fortunate enough to go to the movies again i will. i want to go so so bad im not sure why but i do and maybe i will. this is really long and i apparently had a lot to say i really hope it works when i try to save it. great now i probably just jinxed myself. lovely. anywho today had its moments and i cant wait for these two days of slacking off. well i think i covered it all. tootles