i feel the lowest self esteem right now. something happened today, between matt and stevie, and me, and it makes me feel sick to know i've messed things up. i feel like its partly my fault, and well, its more than just today. matt, he isnt the friend he used to be to me, and of course that'd be my fault too. i dont know if its bc of me being such good friends with stevie or what. i honestly have no idea what he is trying to do, or wants to do, or anything. i just dont know him anymore. i've tried to be nice about this, but he ignores me. so i'll say this. matt, your a person that people like to hang out with, and thats it. you cant share personal problems with you. you dont care. to you, everyone is whining, and trying to get pity, but you are the only one who actually has problems, and your problems are the imporatant ones. everyone else is just wanting attention or something. i sure wish i knew what happened to you. and i hope you'll forgive me, because i really do miss being your friend, and i still want to see you. just you, with no one else there. because i think we need to talk.