im bored. i havent even gone outside my door today. matt's asleep on the floor. he slept until like 2 this after noon. and now he's asleep again. that's not fair. i wish i could sleep like that. i wish i could go see daryl. im sure i can find his house again. man i'm bored. today has felt...i dont know. i cant even explain it. its like, time is standing still. but the sun is moving, because it's starting to get dark. he doesn't care. he's over it. he doesn't want me again. oh so many things to think about. i really cant wiat utnil school starts. i have to get a job this week. i have no idea where....but unfortunately mom is making me go to work with her tomorrow (and i'd rather die in my sleep) and then we're going to look at jobs. because "she needs to be there with me" bullshit. she just wants my help with cleaning that fucking house. sometimes i very much dislike her. her coniving ways. i wish i already had a job so i could say fuck you and leave. ah yeah...right. fuck me......i hate myself today. gee, is it already that time again? seems like we were just here. hmm...my how time flies. can it only be the beginning of july. mother fucker i think it is. so many weeks to go. and all i want is somewhere to be everyday...where i can see those who torment me. instead of just imagine them. oh like i always say...what's the point. im not so sure anymore. you couldn't cut the self laothing in here with a knife. ok fine. i'm leaving.