today was the first day i think i actually had a little bit of fun since we got out of school. mom feels guilty about leaving and going to disney world with out me, i can tell. she 'treated' me to a day in st augustine today. took me to a few thrift shops there...not that great in selection of those....but i found this really awesome dress. but it was 50 dollars so i didnt get it. it was so cool, but that store was way overpriced. went to eat at some place called the conch....didnt like it so we had an appetizer and went to outback. then while we were there....had some dacaris...yummy, love those...then i ate about three bites of my dinner and had to stop. too much food. i got sick. ugh i thought i was gonna throw up. it was awful. i had to go and wait ouside until mom finished with the bill. i couldnt stand the smell of the place. then we went to the beach. for about an hour or so. it was nice. late not many people there. havent been there this year yet. i usually dont like going becasue it's hot and i get sunburnt and all those people are there...but it wasnt that bad this time. im watching gone in 60 seconds, this movie is so awesome. love the cars. it was at the part where angelina jolie was half seducing whats his face and he kept making references to cars...then when she stopped he said "good beakes". good stuff got those books for english next year. two of them are short...the other looks short...but thats only bc the words are microscopic. ooh car chase....such a sad thing to see such a gorgious car...mustang...be torn up like that. it's probably a fake anyways. still looks pretty damn good. ill sing it one last time for you and then we really have to go youve been the only things thats right in all ive done i can barely look at you cause every single time i do i know we'll make it anywhere only for sure i love this song. snow patrol, i think this is their only good song. kinda like the exies...ugly rocks but they're other songs arent that great. at least not the ones iv'e heard. i hate it when that happens. you hear a really good song and you think well, the rest of them must be great too, but no. you find out all their talent went into that one song alone. only three more days to get through. i've made it this far. i hope i can make it the rest of the way without seeing him. i never thought i'd be so hard. reminds me of that christmas vacation with josh.....ack. why can't i get him out of my head. i dont understand it. he's everywhere. i see him in so many people, i hear his voice in others. it's getting creepy. but he wont go away. and i can't stop thinking about it. i hope he is tormented by me as much as i'm tormented by him. it just wouldn't be right otherwise. i have his number. i've never called it. i've had it for months now. even when i was single and wanted to call him so bad. i couldnt do it. i still can't. i probly never will. i'd like us to be friends. i need to smack myself everytime i think of him or say his name. the forbidden. grr and double grr. i have someone better now. he should be the last thing on my mind. i think this is long enough. i'll stop now.