well when i said things are getting icky, i meant its at that point in the relationship where seeing each other at school, apparently isnt enough. yea im sure she would let me go somewhere if other people are there...other people that she has met before. things get so complicated with her. i was lonely in 2nd period yesterday. justin and daryl were both in rotc and i had no one to talk to except josh (yuck) and if you ever wanna come over and talk to me i wouldnt care. even if i was upset or mad, or anything it doesnt bother me when poeple talk to me. of course if i was upset about something i'd probably start telling you about it and so any one can talk to me whenever unless it's a person who made me mad. and that person today was jose. little shithead. he took my bag this morning and put it in the library. i was almost ten minutes late for first period. again. that's the third time this week i've been late to first period. i told her what happened and i dont know if she bought it as an excuse or not but i was very pissed off during that class, and i wanted to choke jose. especially after he did it again...again...at lunch. and tried to do it again...once again...when i was walking to fifth period. luckily he didn't succeed that time. last year, on this day, josh asked me out. i thought i'd be a little upset or depressed about that since that whole thing went down with him a few weeks ago. but i think i was fine with it. i think i'll also be fine on the 19th, which is during spring break...which is the day he dumped me to fuck someone else. that hurt a lot. i remember that day. he gave me a note after second period, and i read it in third, and i think i started tearing up but i dont remember. i was upset though, none the less. i think im having a problem committing myself to jesse. oh there's that c word. commit. dont you hate that word. i guess since i got so attatched to josh, im afriad to do it again. but maybe after a while it will go away. matt's coming over tonight. some time. tomorrow we get to have a yard sale.yay *sarcasm* but matt will be there to hang out with me instead of being bored to insanity at some flea market with people who dont speak english. but i like yard sales. you can buy other people's junk and sell yours at the same time. isn't that wierd? well i guess that's it for now. i've got planning for spring break between two people right now to do. it's kind of hard to write here and to them at the same time. tootles