I'm happy. truly happy. as happy as possible I guess. meh. Fuck that. I'm turning emo. that's what guys will do to you I guess. bleh... I am secretly in lust with jesse farrell. I love that kid, kidding . I love kissing new people, and then I think about having a boyfriend or whatever and how horrible I would be. and I think I want someone for a long term thing.. like Alex and Eric.. soo content.. but deep down I know otherwise. really, I do. hahahhaha fuck me. I am sooo mentally incapable of this shit. Tom just called me.. I am going up to joey's camp for the night with a bunch of mugs... to drink and what not. joy. I love those kids, but I dont know I dont want to deal with that. yayyy I'M BEING AN EMO PIECE OF SHIT. blow me. I love this. not.