ahahh sooo I was thinking about ben not having a life, and I thought, that since i put his screen name in this entry, hmm what if he googled his screen name because he would do something like that. so I googled it, and 3 links popped up, 2 to this and a third to something else. basically. so ahaha in the event that he found it, he knows everything. and that's bad. and I don't know why I thought he had read this, it just sort of came to me but ahhhh that would be funny. funny in an embarassing and invasive and painful kind of way. this is my escape. this is how I avoid telling him this is how I get over the ridiculous little things that I manage to let bother me. and if he saw this, I probably wouldn't be able to talk to him. ever. which could be a good thing, it will get me over this, probably the most painful way, but it would work. ahhh. my back is killing me. And I didn't sleep well last night. I have 2 more days and then back home. johnny is picking me up at the airport.. ahh I love johnny. so much. he's my backbone. he's more than that. mmmm I'm so tired. too tired.