I'm tired. so tired. rob wants me. really bad. grrrroooosssss. he wants to hang out all the time. I know I 've said blah blah blah i'd bang you or whatever, completely messing around and joking and being me. and he doesn't get it. i've told him ehh no. and why but its just not working. I cant because I'm hurt. I can't because I'm angry. I can't because of Ben. the fact that they're room mates. that I dont have any interest in him what so ever. I can't because I have feelings for ben. not him. not anyone else. thats why. and i wish I could tell him that but that'd kill him. and ben. I wish I could tell him how I felt but that wont happen. I dont want to be there. yet I do. I want to just sleep with him right there. or to wake up when he gets home from work and ahhhhrgh.