canada. 4 weeks. tired. so tired. we actually had a conversation about "us".. for the first time... in the 10 months we've been whatever we are. not that it got anywhere. I don't know what he's saying half the time. and I re read things and over analyze and do it again and again until it's lost it's significance because I've questioned it and broken it down and made it not make sense. I read it all, over and over again, and then I convince myself it meant something else. ah. what am I doing. thursday. and where the fuck is he. I haven't talked to him since this morning. ahh what am I turning into. sometimes I think. I don't know, I don't know what I think or why or why I am so angry and tired... and all I want to do is sleep.. next to him.