feeling rather alone right now. not in the mood for partying, but also not in the mood for staying home alone again. my best friend has a boyfriend now and i'm very happy that she's in love and all...but like i predicted she's one of those girls who once they have a boyfriend can't seem to spend time with their friends. i don't feel like being a third wheel so yeah here i sit. probably going to watch a movie or something, maybe invite my guy friend over even though i don't want him to think that means i want to get with him. he once again told me that he wants to make out with me. i told him i would next time it rains cuz i've always wanted to kiss someone in the rain. that probably wasn't a good idea since i don't like him as more than a friend, but i need some affection. what's a girl to do, ya know. i'm still a firm believer that u shouldn't hook up with your friends because it will ruin the friendship, but my intentions are good. i'm not going to hook up with him, just maybe a kiss in the rain. so anyways, yeah i'm lonely. too cold to go out and about and party and what not. guess i'll just be lonely until summer. then back to the partying and meeting new boys. i definately need new guys in my life if i'm resorting to getting attention from my good friends (who secretly want me). and no that wasn't a conceited remark, i just happen to know that he wants me...so i guess its not a secret. whatever. blah. i'll write more later.