ok so i haven't updated in awhile and a lot more has happened than i care to write about. K7 J14 and E all make me feel like shit. i have a cold and i'm super depressed right now. i hate men and apparently they hate me. K7 still hasn't returned my gate key yet...and when he didn't answer his phone the other night i punched my mirror a couple times in frustration and it shattered. and i guess i drunkenly texted J14 and E to tell them about it and to say other things that didn't make sense. E was cool about it but J14 just informed me that he doesn't think he wants to hang out with me because that display was quite the turn off and that i have a drinking problem. whatever J14. i told him no worries i won't text or call u anymore. and i think that's that. no more nice J14. the older i get the more of a fuck up i become. E on the other hand makes me feel so undesirable. he'll slap my ass or bite my boob and be all flirtatious and playful but when i go to kiss him he'll peck me on the lips for like half a second then pull away. we still haven't hooked up and he makes me feel like there's something wrong with me. i thought he might be a virgin but he's not. so its just me i guess. lots of text messages were exchanged after he left my house last night. the last thing i said was "i know i'm going to regret this but maybe we shouldn't talk anymore. i like u way too much and i can tell the feeling isn't mutual. i'd rather just end it now than get hurt later." he didn't respond. then today he leaves a myspace comment on one of my new pics saying how hot i am...wtf i said we shouldn't talk anymore homie. i hate men...and apparently they hate me too.