ok i just saw the front page and now know that my friends list is safe and sound. and this morning i woke up and looked at myself (my hair looks exceptionally gorgeous...even though i haven't brushed it yet) and i'm hot like fire. fuck K7 i'm going to find myself some new guys...and i already have so. i've never met anyone from the internet before but i was talking to this guy on myspace because he was kinda cute and he immed me so why not. he asked me where in riverside i live...i said do u know where suchandsuch highschool is? he said yeah i live by it right off of suchanchsuch ave. (which is where i live). he then asks if i know where suchandsuch park is, and i say yes (because i live literally 2 houses down from suchandsuch park). he then says he lives at the end of suchandsuch street (which is right across the park from me). i was like well hello neighbor. the guy i lost my virginity to used to live on that street, so i was like did u ever know a guy named *** ***? he said well if thats the *** i'm thinking of then i think we live in his old house. omg its the weirdest feeling ever. now i have to hang out with this guy a.s.a.p because i need to go into that house again. he lives in the house that the only guy i have ever loved lived in. i was like that's crazy i lost my virginity in your house...and i've thrown up in your bathroom several times. the only downfall is that he's a stoner...i don't smoke i just drink. hugs not drugs! ha ha. oh yeah and he's on house arrest...ok so he's not the one for me but i want to kick it with him so that i can go inside that house again. i can't get too drunk while in that house though because i'll for sure get emotional and cry. the new guy (i call him thenew******boy) said that *** stopped by the other day...so maybe *** rents his house to them and didn't actually sell it. i dunno, but seeing *** again would be weird, it's been like 3 years i think. anyways that's the new guy, i'll call him S. he's 23 so atleast he's good for alcohol...the only bad thing is that i haven't actually met him in person. i just figure since he's like a neighbor it can't hurt to meet him. ok guy #2 is a friend of my cousins. he's R. R lives close too...i just found out that he lives in this house not too far from where i used to live. when i was a little kid i wanted to live in the house he now lives in because it looks like a castle. i told him that and he said he'd be glad to give me a tour of his castle house and to just hit him up whenever (he's now given me his phone number 3 times...but i don't call boys they call me). this guy i have met a couple times before and he seems like a fun guy. so basically the new plan is to start meeting guys and "get out there." i know K7 is bad for me so i'll just start looking instead of sitting here feeling pissed off and sad all of the time. i have more to say about the awful dinner i had to endure with relatives last night, but i'm quite hungry so it will have to wait. have a swell day everyone.