i'll never be good enough. not for my parents, my brother, anyone. i fuck up so much. i'm not smart enough, pretty enough, skinny enough. just not enough of anything. almost 21 and still no idea what i'm going to do with my life. i have trust issues with guys and don't know when or if i'll ever be able to let that go. within this last year i was raped, got my heart broken, and realized my life is going nowhere. it started off so great, moved out of my parents house and was just so happy. that happiness has slowly been deteriorating. one bad thing after the next. that's the way my life always seems to go. but i'm out of touch with reality and always seem to think i'll figure it all out eventually. so i'll just stick with that for now. yeah. ok i feel a little bit better now that i got that out.