all the sudden i want nice guy (C9) to call me. i want someone to be close to me. i need affection. someone hug me! i also want a cookie fresh from the oven with a glass of milk. i'm having crazy cravings right now someone feed me. i just had a mexican pizza from taco bell. i'm so glad that i can think outside the bun. yay me. boys! gah. i'm still abstaining. i think the only reason this has lasted this far is because i haven't gone out yet. i'm in my safe zone! tomorrow's friday. i will not look for a party or kickback...but if someone happens to call me and tell me to go hang out with them at a party or kick back then i might have to go. but as long as i'm with a large group of people i should be fine. i'm just about ready to say f*ck it and give in. maybe i'll just sleep with nice guy and no one else. he's a nice guy he deserves some lovin'. that is so long as he's not gettin' any from other girls. i think he should call again and this time i won't lie to get out of hanging out with him. i'll go to his house and we'll talk. maybe if i mention that i'm getting tired of the whole casual thing he'll get the point that he either needs to leave me alone or commit to me. but do i want that? i do and i don't. for some reason i always want better. yeah he's as nice as they get, and 21 (always a plus)...but me being the semi-shallow girl that i am think that i can get a hotter guy. don't get me wrong hes cute as all hell...but he's not one to completely drool over. my hair looks really good tonight. i have an interview type thing next thursday. yay me. its for a book store. if i get the job i'll probably get a discount yay! i love to read. yeah i'm a dork like that. i'll sit down and read a book cover to cover during the day, then go out and party at night. i'm just cool like that. smart fun and hot! so why am i single? cuz i'm messed up! yay me. damn johnny knoxville is hot. t.v. at its finest right there. if i get that job my first pay check goes to my hair, a manicure and pedicure, the hot $160. shirt i want from nordstroms, and beer. god i miss having an income. alright i'm done for now, hopefully i'll have something more interesting to write about after this weekend. goodnight everyone.