"If you didn't fucking ask, you wouldn't be so disappointed with the answer." And there concludes that thought. So here I am. On a bright, sunny, warm, intoxicating Saturday afternoon. Sitting on the computer wishing I was someone else. Trying to pretend it's all going to be okay. Well you know what? [Chicken Butt] And don't you forget it! So PRD replied to my e mail. AWWWWWWW. How fucking sweet. Well I must say I actually met a guy last night that I would give. PRD. completely up for. His name's WILL. (Side bar: I'll probably never, ever see him again, *Frown*) But still. He was so attractive. At least at the time. I didn't notice at first. But when I moved closer. O LORD! He looked just like I've pictured my. love. a thousand hundred times before. Arched eyebrows. Dark hair. Dark eyes. Dimples. Nice build. Obnoxious attitude. And did I mention, fucking dimples? O DOG! And his eyes did that squinting thing when he smiled or laughed. Man, now I've got him stuck on my brain. It is a little better than PRD though. I mean I would take WILL over P hands down. It's so unfortunate that I'm a grotesque beast. I may have gotten lucky LAST NIGHT! But no, I'm chunky and greasy and unattractive. It isn't fucking fair! I have never wished so much before that I had been born a BARBIE than I did last night. [Extra bonus: He smokes like a fucking chimney] DAMN ME FOR BEING HIDEOUS! I would've brought him home if I had. had. the CAHONEES! (Balls) Damn, it sucks being me. I can't think of anyone else who is as UN-lucky as I am. I mean. not even the NERDS. want me. How pathetic is that? Man, WILL was so hot. So. so. so. so. so. so. so. so. so. so. so. HOT! I would seriously give up PRD anytime, anywhere, any-place, if I could get my grimy little hands on WILL. (He did lack a sense of humor though, so that's kind of bad) I don't like boring people. People that don't have anything to feed me mentally. It dawned on my yesterday that I barely. ever. Listen to what the hell SEB is saying. And she's supposed to be my best friend. I realized that 9 out of the 10 things she talks about. have no meaning at all. But yet I listen. Well no. I drift off and let my mind wander freely for a few minutes. Than when she says something like: "I like rubber nipples." I find myself quickly coming back to reality. I don't know. All I do know. Is I am not going to stay this chunky, happy, dumbass girl everyone has come to know me as. I shalt not! "Rise above the flame and you'll never be the same." Exactly. Well I think now I'll drive down to the Salvation Army and apply for a fucking job. [Clothing Inspector] This could be entertaining. Maybe? Or completely harmful to my health. But as long as I'm getting paid, so the fuck what! "Bite it bitch!" DFN.